Best. Obit. Ever.

My friend Richard who, I believe, has always had a love of words, shared this incredibly well-written obituary.

Tim Schrant of Spillville,  Iowa, died on March 29th of this year, and it appears he lived one helluva life! His obituary was printed on the Schluter-Balik Funeral Home's website:

Tim Schrandt (Lynyrd) made his last inappropriate comment on March 29, 2019. - Schluter-Balik Funeral Home 

That line right there makes me wonder what the final comment could have been. The obituary goes on to make mention of his school-aged years at a Catholic school, and it looks like he made quite an impression on the faculty:

We’re not saying the nuns won, but they put up a good fight, we mean literally - he got into a fist-a-cuff with a nun.

The  obituary also, in a round-about way, gives advice to those of us still living  (read: you need to downsize before you die):

Tim leaves behind a hell of a lot of stuff that his family doesn't know what to do with. So, if you are looking for a Virgin Mary in a bathtub shrine (you Catholics know what we’re talking about) you should wait the appropriate amount of time and get in touch with them. Tomorrow would be fine.

Uncommon obituaries like these should be much more common, as I think we put way too much emphasis on the living when mourning than we do on "living".

Here's some advice: write your obituary now and make certain to include those "big plans"; maybe that will encourage you to get them done before you're "done"!

This is the only life that is guaranteed. We get no do-overs, no re-tries, no mulligans. Go live.

(Schluter-Balik Funeral Home)