Parents Attempt to Require Their Sister-In-Law Surrogate to Go Along With Birth Plan She Doesn’t Want

A sister-in-law decided to help her brother-in-law and sister-in-law by acting as the surrogate for their baby... the problem is that they now want her to adhere to their birth plan of choice.

In a "Am I The A-----e" Reddit thread, the 34-year-old surrogate shared the story of how her brother-in-law Simon and his wife Michelle attempted to force her into the birth plan that they chose and she didn't want.

The anonymous surrogate explained that the couple struggled with infertility and attempted IVF previously, and even tried surrogacy, however, the surrogate changed her mind at the last moment.

"They have outwardly shown their jealousy of my husband James (34 male) and me for having children, especially as only one of them was planned, and our oldest was born when we were sixteen," she wrote. "They came to me last year and begged me to be their surrogate. I had doubts, as did my husband, but I felt bad for them and decided to go through with it. James supported my decision and has acted like he did with my previous pregnancies, sweet and caring."

Despite James being a doting husband, Simon and Michelle acted as the complete opposite, and quite controlling. They ended up creating meal plans for their sister-in-law and made her take numerous supplements in addition to attending classes. She did explain to them that she knew what to do during a pregnancy as she was pregnant four times previously. However, the poster shared that "They didn’t listen and said to me that just because I was pregnant four times doesn’t mean I’m an expert. I gave up trying to dissuade them as I knew nothing would work."

After some time in the pregnancy, the two couples went over the birth plan which caused an explosive argument. The parents wanted their sister-in-law to do an unmedicated water birth. She refused since her second delivery she was too far along in the birth to receive pain relief and the pain she suffered was "horrific" even having a high pain tolerance. She added, "As for the water birth, I don’t like the idea of being submerged in water with blood, other fluids and possibly poop." Simon and Michelle weren't in agreement with her decision.

"They said this was their baby and they should decide how they were born. I retorted and said, this is my body, and I should decide how I want to push out a human that I’m so generously carrying for them," she recalled. "A lot of shouting happened, and I started to get overwhelmed very quickly. I started crying, and Michelle rolled her eyes and told me to grow up. James told her to shut up, which started Simon off, and it was just a mess."

James and the author left their home and she began to regret ever agreeing to become their surrogate in the first place. She later confirmed in responses on the post that she did this to be kind and was not receiving any money from the couple nor did they discuss their apparent requirements and rules for their surrogate. Michelle and Simon ended up calling James' parents who then called James and the writer. The parents couldn't believe Michelle and Simon's demands and were on James and his wife's side. The parents promised that they would talk with Simon and Michelle.

"I’m due in two weeks, and I’m so nervous. A part of me doesn’t want them there, but I know they have to be, seeing as it’s their child. James disagrees. He said that he'll have them kicked out if they do anything to upset or stress me out. Even my oldest agrees with him, and he won’t even be in the room," she concluded.