Things My Daughters Say

Because I'm off from my day job on Fridays, I get to spend the day with my daughters Ava, age seven, and Camille, age five. Getting to spend the whole day with them makes me look forward to Friday even more. We usually go out to eat breakfast or lunch and then rent a movie to watch at home or go walk around a store (or stores) of their choosing. Their favorite is what I call "the free zoo," a.k.a. Pet Smart.

On our way to lunch earlier today, I was trying to switch lanes on Johnston Street (no easy feat, especially at lunch time) and I thought aloud to the truck in "my way," "Hey, I have an idea, how about letting me in there, buddy?"

Just minutes before, my daughters had raised their voices in a panicked chorus: "Daddy! There are ANTS back here!" I told them to just flick them off of themselves; I had to worry about driving.

After my comment to the driver in the other lane, my daughter Camille says:

"Hey, I have an idea! Let's all fart to kill the ants back here!"

After successfully switching lanes and regaining normal breathing patterns from laughing so hard, I asked Camille where she came up with her ant-killing tactic.

"On Littlest Pet Shops," (a cartoon based on the toys of the same name, which both of my girls love) "a skunk farted and everybody passed out."

I decided to make the moment a teachable one by explaining that skunks don't fart (although I'm sure they do), they spray. The silence that followed that lesson told me that either A) they didn't understand B) they didn't care or C) all of the above. Since I'm used to that reaction from them (and their mother) I wasn't hurt.

I hope you enjoyed this first in a series featuring the words of wisdom that issue forth from the mouth of my babes.