When Madonna takes a break from her busy pants dropping schedule on her MDNA tour, we imagine she sits in a room, continuously tells herself how wonderful she is, and just thinks of ways to not only shock us normal people, but even some of the top celebrities too. After all, she is Madonna. 

Well, there’s good news for all of you celebrity haters out there. We have another reason for you to turn your nose up at the A-list crowd, and it comes in the form of Madge’s tour rider. Metro published a copy of the Material Girl’s divalicious concert demands, and boy, are they damn good!

The following is a list of what she requires:

  • A 200 person entourage (includes a yoga instructor, personal chef, and 30 bodyguards)
  • Her personal chef can only prepare strictly vegan foods
  • 20 international phone lines in her dressing room
  • The backstage area must look like Madonna’s home in every place she visits. “Madonna requires all the furniture be removed from the rooms and replaced with her own pieces that she has shipped.”
  • Furniture draped in a special fabric that smells like lilies and roses
  • Actual flowers, cut to a perfect 6-inch stem
  • Her own dry-cleaning service on the premises of her shows

You know what would be on our rider? Flamin’ Hot Cheetos, coffee, and all seven seasons of ‘Buffy the Vampire Slayer.’ Seriously, we’d need some down time too.

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